Shaving the Pussy

March 9th, 2010

Her: I had to get my physical today. Me: Oh! is your tinker in tip top shape? Her: Lmao! That took me a while to figure out, but yeah, might have to shave it later. Me" I was talking about your heart you tardo, not your pussy, but hey if you shave your heart then more power to you. Her" Wow im laughing so f""king hard and im not telling anyone why
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Rating: 7.6/10 (14 votes cast)
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Rating: +13 (from 19 votes)
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Drunk Logic

March 8th, 2010

...."IM TOO DRUNK TO GET PREGNANT" hahaha I love how logical drunk-me is... haha
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Rating: 7.6/10 (10 votes cast)
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Rating: +14 (from 18 votes)
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WHY DID HE SAY THAT???

March 5th, 2010

he looked at me after we got done and say whens the next time...
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Rating: 7.3/10 (10 votes cast)
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Rating: +8 (from 16 votes)
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Big Head

March 4th, 2010

If your head was any bigger your neck would collapse. You are one arrogant S.O.B.
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Rating: 6.7/10 (9 votes cast)
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Rating: +2 (from 14 votes)
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Cottage Cheese Costed Me a Piece of Tail

March 4th, 2010

If you're wondering why you didn't get any last night it's because you ordered me the side of cottage cheese while I was in the bathroom. You should no by now I don't like that.
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Rating: 5.8/10 (8 votes cast)
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Rating: -1 (from 13 votes)
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nobodys perfect

March 4th, 2010

3:05 am; why is your boyfriend so perfect and mine is so perfectly retarded?
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Rating: 4.8/10 (11 votes cast)
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Rating: +5 (from 21 votes)
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Would you count it?

March 3rd, 2010

I finally got to do her and I went after about 18 seconds. She was disappointed, but I could really care less. I'm just glad it happened.
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Rating: 8.4/10 (16 votes cast)
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Rating: -7 (from 27 votes)
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The Key

March 3rd, 2010

You hold the key to my pony. You have permission to ride it anytime you want. That's the perks of being with someone like me. Enjoy.
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Rating: 8.7/10 (16 votes cast)
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Rating: +16 (from 22 votes)
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accidentally frm my mother

March 3rd, 2010

my nipples need a good twisting
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Rating: 9.4/10 (17 votes cast)
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Rating: +13 (from 29 votes)
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Naked Twister

March 2nd, 2010

Hey Baby do you want to play naked twister tonight? Dad Replies: Oh yes honey the best family game
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Rating: 8.1/10 (14 votes cast)
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Rating: +15 (from 23 votes)
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