January 16th, 2010
him: i love you too baby (wtf did i say last night??)
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Rating: 7.3/10 (10 votes cast)
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Rating: +4 (from 12 votes)
January 15th, 2010
So I walked in on my mom smoking weed. She said it was from my pants pocket, so we got high and she made me grilled cheese. Winter break is so relaxing.
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Rating: 8.5/10 (18 votes cast)
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Rating: +31 (from 39 votes)
January 15th, 2010
Her little sister wanted to play hide and seek, i told her to hide then me and her went to her room and had sex. her little sister was hiding under the bed.
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Rating: 9.4/10 (34 votes cast)
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Rating: +51 (from 57 votes)
January 15th, 2010
Screwing a fat chick and fighting the cops are one in the same. If I'm loaded, I'll do it, and you'll never let me forget it.
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Rating: 7.9/10 (9 votes cast)
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Rating: +8 (from 12 votes)
January 14th, 2010
Peeing in the bath tub was easier than the toilet last night.
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Rating: 9.8/10 (10 votes cast)
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Rating: +11 (from 17 votes)
January 14th, 2010
I still cant feel my right nut after it got tasered last night. I hate you assholes
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Rating: 8.5/10 (12 votes cast)
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Rating: +12 (from 20 votes)
January 14th, 2010
Yeah that is the last time I pass out before everyone, i have a sharpie'd dick on my cheek, and "i luv boyz" on my forehead. It wont come off
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Rating: 9.9/10 (18 votes cast)
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Rating: +22 (from 24 votes)
January 13th, 2010
She thinks that she has pink eye because i shot it in her eye when she was drunk. i kinda like telling her to get away bc i dont wanna catch it
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Rating: 7.3/10 (13 votes cast)
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Rating: +11 (from 23 votes)
January 13th, 2010
I love welcome back week, so much free food so little time.
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Rating: 5.0/10 (6 votes cast)
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Rating: +5 (from 11 votes)
January 11th, 2010
Why did you think it would be funny to shit in my fishtank, and how the hell did you do it?
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Rating: 9.1/10 (28 votes cast)
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Rating: +29 (from 37 votes)
